Job Chapter 5

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Lesson 5

Scripture: Job 29:1-31:40

Main Idea: Job is reflecting on his life

          In chapters 29, 30 and 31 Job struggles with his past and his present in trying to understand what has happened to him. He begins by lamenting (I like that word, it replaces whining) about what life used to be like. He talks about the wealth he used to enjoy and the respect of the people around him who sought out his consul. In our world today we also seek out those who seem to have it all together and who are successful in their jobs, lives and the world. Often we look to them to determine how to get our own lives in order. As Job talks about all he used to have, it would seem that he misses it and desires to have it again. Is that the case? Does he desire wealth about everything else? He begins a discussion if you would that would make one argue that Job is James, defining himself not by his faith but by his works. He reminds us that it is he who used to be listened to and respected. Now he begins in chapter 30 to deal with the world that he now must live in. A world where the children of those Job once despised in life, now spit on him and pick on him. I cannot help but think of the line that tells us that people kick you when you are down. That seems to sum up Job’s speech in chapter 30. Those whom he lifted up, fed, nourished and clothed are now the ones who are first to kick him, taunt him and beat him. Do we are a society really pick on those who have been successful fall? There is an American saying that we always root for the underdog. Is this not the human nature that we see showing itself through in chapter 30?

          What is interesting in the midst of chapter 30 is the emotion of Job’s response. He doesn’t just whine about his situation, rather he expresses in graphic detail how the world has turned against him. I wonder if this dialogue is more pointed at us than his actual situation. That is to say that God wants us to see through Job’s suffering how humanity treats each other in times of dire circumstances. Especially the people whose lives have been the subject of our jealousy or desire. And in the midst of this Job turns his eyes upon God. Why have you cast me down the way that you have? Why are you being so cruel to me? Rather than the storm of justice I expect from God, Job says I find myself in the midst of a greater storm where I am the enemy rather than your friend.

          In chapter 31 he again argues his righteousness. His life was wonderful, now it is horrible and yet I have not done anything wrong. Then the goes so far as to list the sins of his day. They are: lust, committing evil acts against others, lying, abandoning his faith, adultery, cruelty or indifference to slaves, not doing anything about the suffering of the poor, putting wealth before God, idolatry, hatred, indifference, hypocrisy, or stealing. As we look at this list, is Job trying to justify himself or reflect on his life in order to understand what is happening to him? Is this a discussion of a righteous man wronged or a man trying to find what wrong he has done? In our day, there are those who will quickly remind you if you are troubled that you have committed some sin against God and if you figure out what you did and ask forgiveness your suffering will go away. What do you think?

          This part ends with the words, “The words of Job are ended.” But I really think it ends with the next line in chapter 32 which says, “So these three men ceases to answer Job, because he was righteous in his own eyes.” What does this mean to you?

Questions

Answer the following questions in discussion group:

1.    Job laments about his past, how does that maybe bring him comfort or pain?

2.    How does your past affect your present?

3.    Job’s critique of himself serves what purpose?

4.    Job compares himself to the list of sins of his day. Do we do the same?

5.    Is the list different in our day?

6.    What is the worst sin according to Job?

7.    “I’d give anything to have my youth back” is an expression we have all heard. Would you?

Job Chapter 4

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Lesson 4

Read in Scripture: Job 28: 1-28

The main idea in this section is the question, is there wisdom in all of this suffering?

Where did this chapter come from? That is probably a great question to ask in light of the fact that it follows none of the previous chapters tone or writing style. Is it Job? Probably not! It does not follow the argument of Job of his righteous nor deal with any of his suffering. And it certainly does not fit any of the three friends in their line of thinking. Rather it seems to be a narration similar to that of the first section where we are told the story of Job. It provides a break for understanding in the midst of the discussion. We are brought into a contemplative place to explore the deeper wisdom of God. When everything we know cannot explain the why or how of it, only God has the answer that we need. 

A great deal of time is spent on mining. Why? Probably to bring us to an understanding of what humans will do for wealth. We will dig as deep as we need to find precious metals and jewels. We will send people miles beneath the surface of the earth to find these things and put them in dangerous situations, all to secure wealth. Just think of it for a moment. Men (and women) would easily go into a place deep within the bowels of the earth, where air is thick and dense making it hard to breathe, where the slightest shift in earth can bring your world crashing down upon you, all for what, gold or diamonds or precious metals? But the truth is we value wealth more than life itself. At least if we are truthful with ourselves. I remember the old adage, “You can’t take it with you” and I have often wondered if that is the basis for trying to claim and spend it before we go. 

But what will we do to find wisdom?

And where will we go to look for it?

Solomon is considered by history as one of the wisest of people and maybe there is part of the answer to the vexing question of wisdom. Where did Solomon go for wisdom? He went to God. In this chapter we see the writer telling us that humans cannot find true wisdom. It is nowhere to be found on the surface of the earth, nor in the deepest trenches in the sea. It cannot be bought with the most precious of metals or jewels. Even Abaddon, defined as the place of the dead or the angel of destruction, does not know the answer to wisdom. Only God knows.

And in verse 28 and 29 we are told one of the greatest truths. Wisdom is to follow the will of God and to avoid evil and do good is the true understanding of that wisdom and of God. 

Questions

Answer the following questions in discussion group:

1.    What would you pay for wisdom?

2.    Why does it seem so hard to obtain?

3.    How do you live the truth of verse 28 and 29?

LGBTQ - What is the right question?

Sermon given at Sydenstricker UMC 11/26/17

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^NRS Genesis 19:1 The two angels came to Sodom in the evening, and Lot was sitting in the gateway of Sodom. When Lot saw them, he rose to meet them, and bowed down with his face to the ground. ² He said, "Please, my lords, turn aside to your servant's house and spend the night, and wash your feet; then you can rise early and go on your way." They said, "No; we will spend the night in the square." ³ But he urged them strongly; so they turned aside to him and entered his house; and he made them a feast, and baked unleavened bread, and they ate. ⁴ But before they lay down, the men of the city, the men of Sodom, both young and old, all the people to the last man, surrounded the house; ⁵ and they called to Lot, "Where are the men who came to you tonight? Bring them out to us, so that we may know them." ⁶ Lot went out of the door to the men, shut the door after him, ⁷ and said, "I beg you, my brothers, do not act so wickedly. ⁸ Look, I have two daughters who have not known a man; let me bring them out to you, and do to them as you please; only do nothing to these men, for they have come under the shelter of my roof." ⁹ But they replied, "Stand back!" And they said, "This fellow came here as an alien, and he would play the judge! Now we will deal worse with you than with them." Then they pressed hard against the man Lot, and came near the door to break it down. ¹⁰ But the men inside reached out their hands and brought Lot into the house with them, and shut the door. ¹¹ And they struck with blindness the men who were at the door of the house, both small and great, so that they were unable to find the door. ¹² Then the men said to Lot, "Have you anyone else here? Sons-in-law, sons, daughters, or anyone you have in the city-- bring them out of the place. ¹³ For we are about to destroy this place, because the outcry against its people has become great before the LORD, and the LORD has sent us to destroy it." … ²³ The sun had risen on the earth when Lot came to Zoar. ²⁴ Then the LORD rained on Sodom and Gomorrah sulfur and fire from the LORD out of heaven; ²⁵ and he overthrew those cities, and all the Plain, and all the inhabitants of the cities, and what grew on the ground. ²⁶ But Lot's wife, behind him, looked back, and she became a pillar of salt. ²⁷ Abraham went early in the morning to the place where he had stood before the LORD; ²⁸ and he looked down toward Sodom and Gomorrah and toward all the land of the Plain and saw the smoke of the land going up like the smoke of a furnace. ²⁹ So it was that, when God destroyed the cities of the Plain, God remembered Abraham, and sent Lot out of the midst of the overthrow, when he overthrew the cities in which Lot had settled.

Welcome today to what I hope will be the beginning of fruitful and illuminating discussions. There are plenty of things in this world that we need to be concerned about including war, illness, inhumanity, to name just a few. God loves us unconditionally. God does not put conditions on who we should love and excludes no one from that love. We all agree that God intended many things differently in the beginning at creation. God created male and female to be partners, to procreate, to been at one in stewardship with the world around them and share the love of God with each other and those who came after them. So is the right question, who should we love? Or is the right question about if there are more important issues to discuss?

Should we be discussing the decline in membership of the United Methodist Church who if things don’t change is projected to decline by over 65 % by 2050. Certainly here is an area that needs conversation and resurrection. Should we be discussing the decline in young people, youth and young adults who stay away from the church their parents and grandparents grew up in? Should we be discussing the areas of mission we as a church are ignoring, the marginalized who are struggling while affluent churches thrive? Well the easy answer is yes, yes, yes, yes and more yes. But those are not the central issues I need to address with you today. John Wesley tells us, “You have nothing to do but to save souls. Therefore, spend and be spent in this work. And go not only to those who need you, but to those who need you the most.”

I am here to talk about the LBGTQ issue. For those that may not be aware of what those things stand for it is Lesbian, Gay, Bi-sexual, Trans-gender and Queer. These terms engender somewhere around 3.8 % of the US population according to Huffpost in April 2013 and may be as many as 10 % of the US population. There are estimated to be 549,000 same sex couples in the US or less than 1 % of the total households in the US 2010 census. Anti-same sex marriage laws were ruled unconstitutional in 2015 with the Supreme Court decision. Homosexuality possibly can affect 10 % of the population of the world. “That large a population can hardly be accidental.” (Debate at Virginia Protestant Episcopal Seminary February 1992)

The reason that we need to have this discussion is because it affects most of us in this congregation in one way or the other. Most of us have relationships, family or friends that fit these categories that I have spoken of. Many of us work with, deal with or may even struggle with that our friends or family members fall into these categories. But the most important reason for me to share this topic has to do with what is coming down the road in 2019 for the United Methodist Church. Today a commission of our peers has been meeting to suggest how to maintain unity in the United Methodist Church while recognizing that we don’t all agree on membership, leadership and same-sex marriage within the United Methodist Church. This commission which includes Virginia’s Tom Berlin has been working since 2016 to find a solution that will work going forward. This has been and will continue to be hard work. Often the voices surrounding this issue can be loud, unwilling to compromise and difficult to navigate discussion through. But before we get there, we are here and we need to be able to have clear, honest discussion.

So why did I choose this scripture? Maybe because it seems to be the story of our response to Homosexuality. I so often hear people use this story to justify their view point about homosexuality. Many believe God destroyed the cities of Sodom and Gomorrah because of it. But most theologians believe Sodom was destroyed because of it’s evil, it’s inhospitality to outsiders and that they had turned their back on God. Male rape which was used in that period of time is still prevalent in prisons and certain areas of the world and it used to demoralize, to gain control of and to subordinate those who are they desire to degrade and control. Interestingly enough depending on the version of the Bible you are reading, the words translated in the NIV as “bring them so that we may have sex with them” is based on a verb that is used 810 in the Old Testament. However, we should note that only three times has it been translated as sexual, all other times it means to know, to understand, or to be in relationship with. So let us explore for a moment what the two sides are saying to one another about this subject. Let us deal with the scripture this morning. Angels had come to Sodom to see for themselves what evil was lurking within the city walls because of an outcry against them. In the discussion with Abraham God had determined that if they could find ten that God would spare the city. In those days’ hospitality toward strangers was paramount to surviving in a desert climate and keeping peace throughout the region. Strangers were to be treated with respect. But clearly the people of Sodom were not intent on treating the strangers, the Angels of God with respect. Now the passage indicates that all the people of Sodom were a part of this uprising of sorts but clearly the scriptures indicate that the men were intending some sort of sexual response and we can glean that they intended to abuse the Angels of God. Lot even offers his daughters in place of the Angels, his love for God is that great! This part we are clear though others may argue the exact intent of the words of scripture for us, we all agree that something was not as it was intended to be from the creation of the world in Sodom. So God intended to punish the people by destroying the city and we know from scripture that God did just that. Was the sin of Sodom homosexuality alone, probably not! Was the sin of Sodom evil within the hearts of the people, absolutely!

The traditionalist uses the scripture as the basis for their position. They point to this scripture in Genesis, scripture in Leviticus and in the New Testament, 1 Corinthians, 1 Timothy and Romans. Let us explore that for a moment. We have heard the story in Genesis that is used to identify homosexuality as a sin. They will point to Leviticus 18:22 which say that it is an abomination when a man lies with a man as he would lie with a woman. And Leviticus 20:13 goes further and demands that they be put to death. 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 which says, “Do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived! Fornicators, idolaters, adulterers, male prostitutes, sodomites, ¹⁰ thieves, the greedy, drunkards, revilers, robbers -- none of these will inherit the kingdom of God.” Our scripture today is often used to describe the destruction of Sodom as a result of their lifestyle of homosexuality. Paul in Romans is often quoted. ^NRS Romans 1:26 ^“For this reason God gave them up to degrading passions. Their women exchanged natural intercourse for unnatural, ²⁷ and in the same way also the men, giving up natural intercourse with women, were consumed with passion for one another. Men committed shameless acts with men and received in their own persons the due penalty for their error. ²⁸ And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind and to things that should not be done. ²⁹ They were filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, covetousness, malice. Full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, craftiness, they are gossips, ³⁰ slanderers, God-haters,¹ insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, rebellious toward parents, ³¹ foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. ³² They know God's decree, that those who practice such things deserve to die -- yet they not only do them but even applaud others who practice them.” It’s a long list! And I suspect all of us have sinned somewhere in Paul’s list. Proponents of this view will argue that in Genesis, God created male and female for heterosexual relationships alone. How many of you are wearing some kind of cotton or polyester blend this morning? You are guilty of the same set of laws that condemns homosexuality. It is confusing is it not?

There are three issues before us this morning. First, the issue of acceptance of those who are LGBTQ as members. Second, the acceptance of those who are LGBTQ as Christian leaders. And finally the issue of same-sex marriage. There are folks who will argue that homosexuality is not a choice. Scientific evidence appears to support that for the 1.6 – 6 % of the population that is gay; a percentage is genetically born that way. Those that support gay rights will argue that it should be a civil matter, an issue of equal rights under the law. That there is no difference between the commitment men and women make in heterosexual relationships and the commitment between partners in homosexual relationships. They point to the evidence that is supported by history that gay lifestyles have been the accepted norm in society form the beginning of time up until the last four hundred years of history. It was an accepted practice in the time of Jesus and Paul. Proponents of ‘Gay Rights’ point to Jesus not excluding anyone in his teachings or his behavior and treating everyone with love. Or they point to scripture being written before medical and scientific breakthroughs discovered that much of what we now know about illness, sexual preference and behavior is genetic. All skin diseases were considered leprosy in Jesus day and people were shunned and excluded. Women were treated as property with no value and Jesus railed against that injustice, meanwhile, homosexuality was part of society probably in the same proportions as it is today and He never said a word against it. A report of the committee to study homosexuality to the General Council of Ministries of the United Methodist Church reported that there is scientific evidence sufficient to support the contention that homosexuality is not pathological or otherwise an inversion, developmental failure, or deviant form of life as such, but is rather a human variant, one that can be healthy and whole. The American Physiological Association reported that most people experience little or no sense of choice about their sexual preference and LGBTQ issues have been removed from the list of illnesses reported on by the Medical community.

So where exactly does that leave us? As a United Methodist pastor I live by two books, the Bible and the United Methodist Book of Discipline. I want to read you what the BOD says about this matter. In paragraph 161 the BOD states, “We affirm that all persons are individuals of sacred worth, created in the image of God…The United Methodist Church does not condone the practice of homosexuality and consider this practice incompatible with Christian teaching. We affirm that God’s grace is available to all… We implore families and churches not to reject or condemn lesbian and gay members of friends.”[i] And in paragraph 304.3 it states that practicing homosexuals cannot be ordained or appointed as ministers. In Paragraph 341.6 it says that United Methodist ministers may not perform or participate in same sex marriage ceremonies and paragraph 806.9 that no funds of the United Methodist church may be given to any group or caucus that promotes the acceptance of homosexuality.

As a church we are taught to love one another above all things except loving God. That love is paramount to everything we must do in the world, loving one another. And we are called to that love inclusively. But my heart and mind struggle with creation where it clearly was God’s intent for man and woman to be in heterosexual relationships. It is how we were created in the beginning. But we know that somewhere something went against God’s plan for humanity. God intended the world without sin but we all sin. Is it possible that being genetically predisposed to a sexual preference is a sin. That is one of the questions is it not? I do know that one sin we all share is our desire too often to judge others.

I know that within this church we have family members and actively attending folk who are gay or have friends who are gay. I have a friend who is United Methodist minister who has a daughter who is gay and he says that though he struggles with her lifestyle he does not struggle with loving her unconditionally. Does God love those who were born with homosexual tendencies any less than those born into heterosexual lifestyles? We believe not! Did Paul intend to address an issue in his day of older men who subjected young men into homosexual relationships against their will? Clearly that was a practice of his day that he reaches out to. Do the original rules of Leviticus still hold true today? If so, we violate them every time we eat seafood or pork. Adulterers are no longer stoned to death nor are those who steal losing their hands in our culture. Is it possible that God’s guidelines for living three to four thousand years ago are no longer as relevant as they were in that day and time? And whether we accept it or not, medical advances have changed how we view genetic makeup and illness. Masters and Johnson did a study that said that 67 % of homosexuals could be brought back into heterosexual relationships. But what that means is that 33 % cannot. My study says that there are three ways to become homosexual. One is that you are born that way. The other is that there are men who are more feminine or women who are more masculine and the opposite sex shuns them for their differences. And some come to that preference through abuse. The last two are likely the 67 % in the Masters and Johnson study. But truthfully if someone would say to me that they are gay, I cannot determine how they became that way and frankly I don’t care how they became gay. I also understand that the issue of leadership is about trust and protection for our youth. Statistics tell us that homosexual behavior does not lead to sexual predator behavior at a greater rate than heterosexuals.

So what then is the question?  I think it would be hard pressed for us to say it is as simple as only one question to be answered. I like the way Adam Hamilton sums it up. He reminds us that Paul spoke about seeing things dimly in a mirror that one day we will see clearly, but only when we are truly in the presence of God. I think for all of us this issue is complicated. Will the church split over it and divide? Maybe! Where will Sydenstricker fall in the future United Methodist understanding? These are questions we need to ask. Are we, each of us a traditionalist who cannot accept LGBTQ folks in membership, leadership or marriage? Are we, each of us progressive who cannot accept a traditional stance by the church? Or are we, each of us somewhere in the middle where the church can be church regardless of the position taken at General Conference? Over the next twelve months we will explore these questions in Pastor Chat moments. Would you join me in discussion?

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[i] Smith, Judith E, ed. (2008). The Book of Discipline of the United Methodist Church 2008. Nashville: The United Methodist Publishing House. Page 103

Hand Me Downs

Sermon given at Sydenstricker UMC 11/19/17

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^NIV Matthew 6:25 "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? ²⁶ Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? ²⁷ Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?  ²⁸ "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the flowers of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. ²⁹ Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. ³⁰ If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you-- you of little faith? ³¹ So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' ³² For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. ³³ But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. ³⁴ Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

We live in a hand me down world. Everything in life in some sense is hand me downs. Now I was the oldest of four growing up, three boys and one girl. So my clothes were always new and purchased. I was a skinny kid weighing so little that the wind usually blew me around the neighborhood, at least that is what my mother said. But my brothers received things I wore or discarded as they grew up. I remember my next youngest brother and I would often fight, he wanted to be first but I was. He hated following me in school, not that I was smart mind you, I struggled in school. But he always had to hear the teachers say, why can’t you be like your brother and he bristled every time. Back in those days in small areas you always got the same teachers in school that your older brothers and sisters had. In fact, it carried over to my son who had an English teacher who I happened to go to High School with. Hand me downs!

Our language, our math, our philosophy, and all of our formal and informal education is a hand me down. We owe allegiance if you will to those scholars who developed math like Pascal, Aristotle in philosophy, Euclid for geometry and Shakespeare for literature. Even the Bible is hand me down. The first five books from the oral traditions of creation and life handed down to Moses who had them written down. The prophets whose writings we love or struggle with today were handed down from generation to generation. The New Testament was handed down from the Disciples to written form so that their stories could be told over the generations. All we know about Jesus, about God, and about the Holy Spirit are pretty much handed down to us through the generations. Hand me Downs!

Today we sit in this beautiful place, a building that was built many years ago. Some of you may have been here when the new building was built so I guess you can argue that you are handing down. But even you came from the older building and none of us were around in 1909. So we are handed down our traditions, our discipleship training and the legacies from those who went before us. Several weeks ago we remembered those who left legacies in the last year. Churches are places that get handed down, passing the baton each year to a new generation. Changes constantly taking place as the church grows, declines and hopefully grows again. Hand me Downs!

Someone was telling me the other day about all the problems in their world. I prayed with them and then asked them what they were thankful for? They looked at me like I had suddenly sprouted horns on my forehead. I would love to say that they suddenly began to smile in the midst of their trials and tribulations but they did not. But isn’t that what sets us apart from the world? Shouldn’t we as Christians realize that life is never easy, but we are always forgiven and we have eternal life in the presence of a loving caring God to look forward to? I am told that the secret to having a better Thanksgiving and Christmas is the ancient practice of blessing God. There are so many blessings that we share this time of year. Tomorrow we are helping to serve a dinner for our community. Anyone who wants to show up can and they will be served with great food, great fellowship and smiling faces who will remind them that God loves them. As we become do more and more ministry in our community I am thankful for the opportunity that God gives us to be the face of God. We were after all created in God’s image, each and every one of us, so why shouldn’t we find ways to be thankful for the bounty that we have been given and share that bounty with the world. God created us in God’s image, an image of love and we should be thankful for that. Hand me downs!

We come to this place and this hour in Thanksgiving. I remember many years back being thankful just to be in a place where there was no war, no pain and suffering even if it was for a small piece of time. Now for those of us that serve we are thankful for those times when we have peace, when most if not all of the congregation is stable and at least for a while, health issues are not center stage. But even in the worst of times, God is with us and for that I am ever thankful. In the past I have felt the call of God to change direction and visit a member of my church who was suffering greatly and on death’s door. Bonnie and I had been out all day and I really wanted to go home and relax a bit, but God nudged me that day as God often does so I immediately turned the car towards Cliff’s house. As it turned out, we arrived at the moment when he was passing. We spent that time with the family and it was a day of grace and mercy that I have felt since then each time I think of it. God is faithful to us! God is constantly working in our lives to bring us to be the creation that God intended in the Garden. A creation at harmony with one another and at harmony with the world around us. Can you imagine what this world would be like if we could find ways to focus on the things we are thankful for, rather than the things we are anxious about? We are truly a hand me down world, aren’t we?

I think that all these hand me downs that we receive are actually blessings to be thankful for. For each book I read, for each story I hear, for each life I share there is a blessing that comes from being a part of something greater, something longer than my own life and something special that is given often without regard to the cost of giving. If the world continues today because of what occurred yesterday, then that hand me down should be appreciated for its value in our lives. Everything we receive is the result of something else that has already occurred and changed the world around us, maybe just a little. God sent us Jesus so that we could truly see and appreciate what God intended in creation. That love is the answer to all of life’s questions. That love can overcome anything that we have to face. And through it all we are reminded that the things handed down in life can often be the best things life has to offer. Hand me downs! 

Jack’s mother called him and told him Mr. Belser had died. Jack thought back to his time with Mr. Belser when he was growing up. Jack’s dad had died and Mr. Belser had taken him under his wing. It was Mr. Belser who taught him carpentry that led to him having a company that built houses, buildings and structures. Jack took time and came home for the funeral. Jack was talking to his mother about his memories and he wondered about the little gold box that Mr. Belser had always kept on the top of his desk. He remembered asking what was in the box and Mr. Belser had told him the most valuable thing he owned was in that box. Jack forgot about the box following his return home from the funeral. Several weeks later a package arrived that Jack signed for. In it was the small gold box. With trembling hands, he opened the letter that accompanied the box and it said upon my death deliver this box to Jack, the most valuable thing I have. As he opened the box he found a beautiful gold pocket watch and when he opened the watch engraved inside it said, Thanks for your time. You see the most valuable thing Mr. Belser had was the time he spent with Jack. Jack told his secretary to clear his calendar that he was going to spend some time with his son. As he walked out the door he told her, thanks for your time. Maybe the most valuable thing we have truly is time and how we spend it becomes the thing we are most thankful for. 

Marriage is...

Sermon given at Sydenstricker UMC 11/12/17

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^NRS Genesis 2:18 Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner." ¹⁹ So out of the ground the LORD God formed every animal of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to the man to see what he would call them; and whatever the man called every living creature, that was its name. ²⁰ The man gave names to all cattle, and to the birds of the air, and to every animal of the field; but for the man there was not found a helper as his partner. ²¹ So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then he took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. ²² And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. ²³ Then the man said, "This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; this one shall be called Woman, for out of Man this one was taken." ²⁴ Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and clings to his wife, and they become one flesh.

We have spent the last two weeks together talking about what it means when marriages fail and sometimes they do. First marriages fail at an alarming rate in America. And that number grows for those in second marriages. It failed for me and for some of you. And it fails because one or both of the parties fails to live up to the standard of marriage in the Bible. We fail at being the perfect partner to our spouse. Most of the writers and commentators of the twentieth century focus on the legalistic aspect of the scriptures and this perspective can and will continue to be harmful to those who through no fault of their own find themselves divorced. This is contrary to what God wants us to know about God’s love, sin and forgiveness. This is contrary to both Paul and Jesus said about divorce and many other things as they fought legalism throughout their ministries. Jesus and Paul held that love was the central aspect of God’s message, not legalism. Legalism is that part of us that wants everything to be black and white and judgmental. The danger of legalism is that legalized obedience to the law, which is supposed to bring us to a state of grace and mercy actually pushes us away from God’s grace instead of allowing us to focus on the imitation of Christ in God’s love for one another.

Let us talk about Paul for a moment. Many will argue that Paul takes a harder line on divorce than Jesus does, especially when it comes to re-marriage. But as you’ve heard me say before, let us remember to always take things in context. For Paul, the context is both his belief in Christ’s return in his lifetime and the tribulation which will precede that return. Paul believed with all his heart, at least until near the end, that Jesus was going to return in his lifetime as did most of the early disciples. Paul also believed that all Christians must walk through a time of tribulation in the final days of the world. Everything that Paul talks about is based on those two beliefs. It shaped his theology and teaching of disciples. Now here is the thing. For the last two weeks, we have studied the Old and New Testament regarding divorce. Some of you have hung on every word, maybe because you or your families have experienced divorce and you want to know. Some of you have scoffed at what is being said, even going so far to say that I’m saying it this way to justify my own experience. And you know what, in a way you’re right. I can truthfully say that I made mistakes in the past and I can also say that I believe that God has forgiven me those mistakes as God forgives us all for our mistakes when we come with repentive hearts. My experience is that we are the ones who can’t seem to forgive one another for stumbling.

The real question for all of us should not be is there divorce and remarriage in the world, we know there is. And it is not about to go away in the future. But the real question is how is the church going to respond to it? When someone in our community suffers because of a relationship break-up, what is our response? Do we reach out in love at a time at a time when they feel the devastation of divorce? What you may not realize is that we, society and the church, isolate those in divorce. When someone dies, we surround them. When someone divorces, we choose sides and most of the time, we just push them away.

So what did Paul say and why did he say it? Well let us start with a truth. The disciples, all of them, believed with all their hearts that Jesus was coming again in their lifetime. They believed that they would see Jesus before they passed away. And because of that they sacrificed whatever was needed in order to be the most obedient, the most loving and the most nurturing people that they could be. The early church surpassed all of our understandings of reaching out to the world. In a mere 70 years, hundreds of thousands had been converted to followers of Christ. Today we struggle to bring one person into relationship with God in our community of eighty thousand. They stood bravely against all odds because they believed that time was short. Paul believed that he would see Jesus personally return to earth before he met his death. And they all believed that there is a period of tribulation and persecution that all Christians who are alive will have to go through. This is particularly important to Paul. It was only as they began to age and die off that they realized that Jesus might not be coming back as soon as they thought. But here’s the deal. If you expected that Jesus was coming again in the near future and that just before he arrived you expected life for Christians to become a terrible time of persecution what would you do? If you knew or believed that tribulation was coming, that persecution which already claimed lives daily was going to get worse, would you marry and have children? Would you recommend to others to do the same thing? Certainly you would struggle to ask people to bring children in the world. And we must see Paul in this context to understand his teaching on marriage, divorce and especially remarriage. We must also understand that Paul truly believed that the best way to follow Christ was as a single person. Dr. Mickey Efird reminds us, “Paul’s counsel to those who were unmarried, therefore, does not reflect a negative outlook toward marriage or sexuality, because his advice was predicated solely on a practical basis, not on theological negativity toward these matters.”[1] Paul in 1 Corinthians, chapter 7 argues against marriage except in the case where emotions are so high that without marriage sin will happen (Sounds a little like high school doesn’t it). But Paul also tells us that if we marry, we do not sin. He just recommended against it. “Paul says nothing explicit about remarriage after divorce because of his understanding that the Parousia was about to come…He did say however, that if unmarried persons decided to marry that no sin was attached to that…Would a divorced person be included among those designated as “unmarried”? The answer is probably “yes.””[2] Parousia is the return of Christ and the lawless period that will precede his return.

Now I intend to diverge for a moment. Why? Because when Jesus responds to the Pharisees in the Gospel account found in Matthew and Mark, he does not respond to their question, “Is divorce ok”. What he says is that divorce happens because we sin; we harden our hearts and become disobedient. Hear the words from Mark 10: 6-9, Jesus response to the Pharisees.

^NRS Mark 10:6 But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.' ⁷ 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, ⁸ and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. ⁹ Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate."

Let us hear the words of Paul found in Hebrews.

^NRS Hebrews 13:1 Let mutual love continue. ^{… 4} Let marriage be held in honor by all, and let the marriage bed be kept undefiled; for God will judge fornicators and adulterers.

And finally hear the message from Ephesians from the Message:

^Message Ephesians 5: 21 Out of respect for Christ, be courteously reverent to one another. ^22-24Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands. ^25-28Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ's love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They're really doing themselves a favor—since they're already "one" in marriage. ^29-33No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That's how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become "one flesh." This is a huge mystery, and I don't pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.

Aren’t those beautiful words? They sum up what God intends for us to understand as the way we are to be in relationship with one another in marriage. What God is trying to tell us throughout the Bible from Genesis to Revelation is summed up in these words. What Jesus and Paul are trying to tell us is that marriage is meant by God to be the perfect relationship. Marriage is meant to be a combining of two spirits, emotionally and physically, in such a way that separation is unthinkable and simply not part of the equation. Some of you have experienced those types of relationships. Some of you are in those types of relationships. And you will probably tell the rest of us that even those types of relationships have times of distress and trouble. But because the two of you have become one, you find ways to get through. And I believe that happens because you follow the rules set forth in Ephesians. It doesn’t say that women should submit to their husbands and become slaves. It doesn’t say that the man is the master. Hear what it says. It says that the two love one another, submitting their individual will to the central will of love that holds you together. You become one flesh. You become one voice. You become one in Christ because you live in obedience to God and each other. Jesus wants us to know that marriage is supposed to be this. “The marriage relationship is intended to be mutually supportive for each of the persons involved.”[3]

This is the truth of God’s message about marriage and divorce, whether from the Old Testament or the New. Whether from the prophets, the Mosaic Law or from Jesus or Paul, the focus of the message has been on what marriage is supposed to be. The reality is that for some of us, either because of our own actions or the actions of our spouses, it doesn’t work that way. And when it doesn’t work that way, we can struggle for years in counseling or abuse and it still is not going to work the way that God wants it to work. And so divorce happens. Dr. Efird asks the appropriate question here. “But is it the greatest sin? The sin from which there is no forgiveness or relief? If the New Testament teachings about forgiveness and new life and new beginnings and true change within people have any validity, is divorce not also to be considered under these principles?”[4]

Each of you has seen people go through the agony of divorce. It is not pretty. Financial lives will suffer for years and where children are involved, relationships may be strained forever. Where children are involved, it is even worse as the two people who could not get along try to raise children with different rules. And the worst thing about divorce is that your friends and family take sides. And often you’re not on the right side. I experienced this mean spirited attitude at an Annual Conference while talking with someone from my home church. And the church often takes the side that divorce is the unforgivable sin and sends the divorcing parties out or isolates them so that they leave. Hopefully I have made you ponder about divorce, remarriage and marriage. Dr. Efird says that the church should take the role of healer and forgiver. “It should be the role of the church to be an instrument of healing and redemption in such a situation. It should not be the role of the church to point accusing fingers of condemnation (even if they may be deserved).”[5] I want to leave you this morning with a quote from the Lynchburg District Superintendent who struggled through divorce and is now remarried. “Personally, I have learned to enjoy my remarriage and the numerous joys and occasional difficulties that always come when families must learn to blend. I have finally learned that God’s grace is much more than a theological concept. It is a precious gift that even ministers can experience and enjoy.”[6]  The message of the Bible from beginning to end is that God loves us. And no matter where we come from, no matter what sins we have committed, there is nothing that will prevent us from the love of God and God’s forgiveness. And there is no sin that can keep us from God’s redeeming grace except denying God. The question we must answer is as a church are we going to love one another or judge them? Let us pray….

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[1] Efird, James M., Marriage and Divorce, Wipf and Stock Publishers, Eugene, Ore, 1985, page 32

[2] Efird, page 80

[3] Efird, page 84

[4] Efird, page 88

[5] Efird, page 90

[6] Davies, Larry, “Adult Bible Study”, Divorce Recovery Workshop Guidebook, page 34

Jesus hates divorce and yet I am

Sermon given at Sydenstricker UMC 11/5/17

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^NRS Mark 10:2 Some Pharisees came, and to test him they asked, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?" ³ He answered them, "What did Moses command you?" ⁴ They said, "Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of dismissal and to divorce her." ⁵ But Jesus said to them, "Because of your hardness of heart he wrote this commandment for you. ⁶ But from the beginning of creation, 'God made them male and female.' ⁷ 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, ⁸ and the two shall become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. ⁹ Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate." ¹⁰ Then in the house the disciples asked him again about this matter. ¹¹ He said to them, "Whoever divorces his wife and marries another commits adultery against her; ¹² and if she divorces her husband and marries another, she commits adultery."

We continue our three-part series on divorce and remarriage this morning. As I said last week, marriage is a sacred institution that God created at the beginning of humanity. And though this institution is sacred, it is not so binding that when things go terribly wrong there is no escape and restitution. But in order to truly understand Jesus teaching on this subject we must first understand the culture of his day and events that were transpiring. Why do we focus on culture? Because everything that happens in the world, including scripture stories, is in the context of what was going on at the time. We cannot view the events of the World War II without seeing it in the context of Pearl Harbor.  One without the other leaves a story that can be construed differently. If we deny the unprovoked attack at Pearl Harbor, then it could be construed that we joined the war effort for any number of reasons.

Dr. Efird, professor of Bible Studies at Duke Seminary tells us, “That divorce was permissible and a part of the accepted practice of the societal community was assumed by the Old Testament writers.”[1] Every culture of the ancient and modern world allowed divorce in some fashion. Some had certain rules to define when and for what reasons divorce may happen, while others annulled the marriage as if it never happened. “From the study of the biblical passages it seems clear that it is assumed that there are situations where “divorce” (if that is the proper word) can and perhaps should be sanctioned.”[2] In the case of Adultery, Abuse or Desertion divorce was an acceptable option. In the Old Testament, everyone was expected to be married, so we can infer from that when one became divorced that they would remarry. “All peoples in the Roman Empire, regardless of their religious affiliation, had the right to divorce their spouses. Marriage was considered a private contract which, like all other contracts, might be dissolved. Divorce was easily attained and, because the state placed heavy financial burdens upon single people, remarriage was encouraged.”[3] In more recent times, we know that the Catholic Church has practiced annulment, the idea that divorce is allowed for certain reasons, and the annulment erases the marriage as if it has never happened. The protestant churches have taken a different view, some taking the view to follow the civil code within their culture while others have condemned divorce entirely as sinful and wrong. How the church has treated divorce depends on the prevailing culture of that area, however, as a rule the church has condemned more than healed! I say sadly because when we condemn those who have been divorced we do so without regard to the reasons for divorce and miss the opportunity to bring the healing power of the church as a positive force in their lives. Personally, my divorce came after four counselors, much prayer and agonizing consequences. In the end we cannot force someone to stay in a relationship nor can we prevent the financial consequences of the breakup of that relationship.  

But to understand Jesus words, we need to understand the things that were going on in his day. There were several that are important for our discussion of divorce and/ or remarriage. First, it was accepted in his day that divorce was allowed, but only for certain reasons. Adultery and abuse were the only acceptable reasons for divorce. Old Testament law held that adultery was punishable by death but by the time of Jesus, the death part had been removed. The other was that a man was responsible for taking care of the needs of his wife as if she were his only wife in the case of multiple spouses. There was one group called the Hillel, a sect of the Jewish leadership that believed that a man could divorce a woman for any reason. A bad meal, growing old or less attractive was justification for divorce. Another group the Shammai group held that divorce was allowed only for adultery and abuse as in the Old Law.  Meanwhile, Herod had married his brother’s wife. Historical records indicate that she had never attained a divorce from her first husband. All of this was going on at the moment that Jesus is asked the question he is asked. The Pharisee’s wanted him to say the wrong thing so they could have grounds to punish him. Or they might have wanted to know whose side he was on. So they ask him this loaded question knowing that the answer will place him on one side or the other.

Jesus teaches us about truth, what is right and just and what God wants us to know. We must be careful with how we interpret Jesus strong words. David Instone-Brewer reminds us, “We also wouldn’t want to take literally many of Jesus’ words in the other sayings in this section.  We wouldn’t, for example, gouge out our right eye if we lust when we see a woman.”[4] There are many New Testament scriptures that focus on the idea of divorce. For the sake of time I am going to focus on this passage from Mark. When Jesus is confronted by the Pharisee’s about divorce, several issues are relevant here. One is the argument between the two groups, the Hillel’s and the Shammai’s that I have described for you already. The other is the idea that woman are considered property in Jesus day and have no voice. Jesus reaches out to the injustice of what is going on in his culture. Dr. Efird says of this passage, “The response by Jesus does not really speak to the issue of divorce, but it (as Jesus so often does) goes to the heart of the real issue. The real issue is not to be preoccupied with how one may legally slip out of a marriage but rather how one makes a real marriage.”[5] Jesus is replying as he often does, by telling us what a marriage should look like. I will talk more on that later. But he is also addressing the idea that divorce has become rampant in his day, just as it has become in our day. Jesus does not say that the old law is no longer valid and divorce is now unlawful. Hear his words! I’m paraphrasing, Moses allowed a man to write a certificate of divorce and it is because of the hardness of your hearts that he wrote this. Jesus is attacking the issues surrounding divorce, not the idea of divorce. And then he goes further. He begins to describe for us what God had in mind in the institution of marriage. That one man and one woman would become one flesh. And when two people enter into a relationship with that kind of understanding, divorce is never a possibility. When you enter into a relationship where you and your spouse become true partners, during the good times and the bad times, divorce is never an option. Maybe the problem is that our culture has changed and we have become more like the Hillel sects thinking that we should divorce for any reason. I will come to verses 11 and 12 in a moment.

Philip Brown in his “Mistakes to Avoid” when discussing Divorce and Remarriage says, “Malachi 2:14‐16 teaches us that God regards wrongful divorce as a sin of treachery against one’s wife and against Himself. Although God hates wrongful divorce, He neither hates all divorces in the same way nor hates every aspect of divorce. He hates what occasions every divorce. He hates the results that often flow to children and to the injured parties of divorce. And God hates divorces wrongly obtained on grounds that He has not permitted. Jesus’ comments on divorce reinforce this conclusion. He specifically recognized it as constituting a change from God’s original plan: “but from the beginning it was not so,” and then it was only because of hardness of heart that the Holy Spirit through Moses allowed divorce (Mat. 19:8).”[6]

So what have we learned so far? In the Old Testament and the New Testament, the idea of divorce was part of the culture of the day and an accepted practice; however it was never the desired or recommended outcome. Most cultural understanding about divorce is that even though divorce is recognized as having some legitimacy, it is only typically in the context of adultery or abuse that it is an acceptable practice. And then only when reconciliation is not possible. And God’s intention is that people live in the institution of marriage for a lifetime. Remarriage after divorce was not only accepted, but was expected in the context of society. So what does Jesus mean in verse 11 and 12? He says that when a man divorces his wife and marries another he commits adultery against her. And when she marries she also commits adultery.

So do we take this to mean that second marriages are one where we live in constant sinful states from which there is no forgiveness? In order to understand this saying of Jesus, we need to go back to the Greek. His use of tense is important so stay with me for a moment. The word "divorces" is in the past tense, while the word "commits" is in the present tense. The single sexual act creates adultery. And that is sinful since the original intent for all marriages is one man and one woman. But the new marriage in the eyes of God is valid and “… it is clear that a divorce opens up the possibility of remarriage to a third party (Deut. 24:2). If divorce did not open the possibility of remarriage, we would expect Moses to prohibit it. If a remarriage to a third party does occur, the new marriage is not regarded as adulterous or the equivalent of adultery. From God’s point of view, it is a true marriage.”[7] In other words, divorce is not an unforgivable sin from which there is no restitution. And so as a church our task is to bring healing during these times of emotional trauma to the parties involved.

I’m running out of time so let me summarize a bit and then finish this discussion next week. God set marriage as a sacred institution to be held in the highest of understandings and to be for a lifetime. Because of our sinful natures, we fail in marriage just as we fail in other ways to be obedience to God. And there are accepted grounds for divorce, even in God’s eyes. They are adultery and abuse. We have expanded them in our modern day to include desertion, only because desertion constitutes abuse under the old law where a man is required to provide for his family and desertion is a violation of that law. When divorce happens, remarriage is allowed, acceptable and expected since God wants us in partnership. Next week I will talk about Paul and about God’s ideal of marriage.

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[1] Efird, James M., Marriage and Divorce, Wipf and Stock Publishers, Eugene, Ore, 1985, pg 40

[2] Efird, Pg 87

[3] Harrell, Pat Edwin, Divorce and Remarriage in the Early Church, R. B. Sweet, Austin, TX, 1967, pg 173

[4]  Instone-Brewer, David,  pg 29

[5] Efird, pg 48

[6] Brown, A. Philip II, “Mistakes to Avoid when Discussing Divorce and Remarriage,” Aldersgate Forum, October 22, 2008, pg 7

[7] Brown, A. Philip II, “Mistakes to Avoid when Discussing Divorce and Remarriage,” Aldersgate Forum, October 22, 2008, pg 11

God hates Divorce and yet I am

Sermon given at Sydenstricker UMC 10/29/17

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^NRS Malachi 2: ¹¹ Judah has been faithless, and abomination has been committed in Israel and in Jerusalem; for Judah has profaned the sanctuary of the LORD, which he loves, and has married the daughter of a foreign god. ¹² May the LORD cut off from the tents of Jacob anyone who does this-- any to witness or answer, or to bring an offering to the LORD of hosts. ¹³ And this you do as well: You cover the LORD's altar with tears, with weeping and groaning because he no longer regards the offering or accepts it with favor at your hand. ¹⁴ You ask, "Why does he not?" Because the LORD was a witness between you and the wife of your youth, to whom you have been faithless, though she is your companion and your wife by covenant. ¹⁵ Did not one God make her? Both flesh and spirit are his. And what does the one God desire? Godly offspring. So look to yourselves, and do not let anyone be faithless to the wife of his youth. ¹⁶ For I hate divorce, says the LORD, the God of Israel, and covering one's garment with violence, says the LORD of hosts. So take heed to yourselves and do not be faithless.

Good morning and welcome. We begin this weekend, a three-part series on divorce. The church in recent years has softened its response to divorce, but when I was coming along, it was one of the taboo subjects of the church. We didn’t talk about it and we sure did not preach sermons unless we found ways to condemn it and those who did it. In fact, even today, some churches will tell you that divorce ranks up there at the top with some of those sins we call unforgivable. Many divorced people found that they are suddenly shunned from the church, even when if they happen to be the innocent party that suddenly found that they are divorced. They will say, I’m divorced, I’m broken and somehow I am no longer acceptable in the world of church. That is how they often are viewed whether that is who they are or not.

I want to start by saying that this is one of the hardest sermon series I have ever done. My desire is to be biblically correct, holding true to tradition, experience and reason, the foundation of our Quadrilateral. In the process my hope is to bring healing where healing is needed. There are some that might say I am preaching from a certain perspective because I have been divorced. I will admit that it gives me the experience to know how the church treats those of us that are divorced. I have also experienced the blessing of churches that have supported me in the midst of divorce. My focus over the next three weeks is to give a message that comes from a true biblical perspective, exploring traditions of the church and factoring in the culture of the day. Marriage is a sacred gift of God to us humans. A loving spouse is a gift that cannot be measured. I suspect that those here today who are in wonderful, partnership relationships will be the first to say that they are thankful for their spouses. They will say that without their spouses they would not have been able to get through the tough times. For those who have been through hard marriages and/ or divorce they will tell you that it was the most devastating thing that ever happened to them. They lost part of themselves in the midst of the divorce that can never be reclaimed. So what does the bible say about divorce? Is it an unforgivable sin?

James Efird, Professor of Biblical Studies at Duke University, says that “Human beings, however, being frail and sinful entities, are not always able to make marriage relationships work successfully.[1] And as Christians, we add to these feelings of guilt and shame by being taught by the church that marriage is forever and when we divorce we have committed an unforgiveable sin. At least that is what the majority of divorced people say the church tells them. When they needed the church the most, the church turned away. When someone dies, the people who have been family and friends surround the person who has survived. When a couple in the church goes through separation and divorce, we take sides. That is what humans do! In life our friends isolate one or the other, people take sides. In the church because of what we have been taught about marriage and divorce, we have a tendency to isolate both of them. Today, 50 % of all marriages in America will end in divorce. Of that number, 81 % will remarry. Of that number 75 % will divorce. It is a tremendous and appalling number. Of the people who go through divorce, most will leave the church and never return.

In order to fully understand divorce, we need to look at it from a biblical perspective. What does God say about divorce in the Old and New Testament? What was the culture of the Old Testament, of Jesus day and of our day? What is the tradition of the church, before Jesus and the Christian church which came after? And finally at the end of the day, as a church, what should our position be towards the people who have become divorced and/ or remarried?

We begin by looking at the Old Testament and ancient culture. This morning’s scripture from Malachi is used more often than any other scripture about divorce. God hates divorce! There is no doubt that this statement rings with truth. But we must ask ourselves why does God hate it? Of the 108 times hate is used in the bible, only four refer to God hating. What God hates is disobedience and evil doing. But to truly understand what God hates, we need to look at what marriage was in those days and what it meant to God.

Dr. Efird tells us, “First of all, most marriages were arranged for the individuals by the families involved.”[2] The basic reason for marriage was to provide stable family environments and produce heirs. In Hebrew practice, only the husband was allowed to create a divorce.  A good starting point would be to identify the roles of men and women in the ancient world. Records back as far as ancient Mesopotamia indicate that divorce was present in those cultures. Divorce was allowable in ancient Greece by submitting a request to the Magistrate. As a side, this is where our civil divorce code comes from. Roman divorce in the early days was rare but civil law allowed it for the man or the woman. In Mosaic Law, divorce was allowable for the men, but could not be initiated by the woman. Women in the Middle Eastern cultures were considered inferior to men and property. Fathers often sold their daughters for prestige and power. Judaism in this context, allowed divorce thousands of years before Jesus birth as a right of the man. “In the Old Testament era it appears that everyone was expected to be married. When divorce occurred, the man and the woman seemed to seek new partners.”[3] It is clear then, that remarriage was an accepted practice. Instone-Brewer tells us, “Divorce is allowed for a limited number of grounds that are found in the Old Testament and affirmed in the New Testament.”[4]

So what do the scriptures tell us?

^NRS Genesis 2: 18 “Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper as his partner.”

Did you hear this scripture; God intended man and woman to be partners. I will come back to this later; this is an important piece of the puzzle of relationship.

^NRS Exodus 20:14 states, “You shall not commit adultery.”

The punishment for adultery in those days was death by stoning. This is one of the Ten Commandments that Moses brought from Mt. Sinai.

^NRS Exodus 21:10 If he takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish the food, clothing, or marital rights of the first wife.

We shall return to this one a little later.

^NRS Leviticus 20:10 If a man commits adultery with the wife of his neighbor, both the adulterer and the adulteress shall be put to death.

So the rules for adultery in Old Testament days has a harsh way of dealing with those found guilty. 

Deuteronomy 24 begins the divorce scriptures. It is foundational in understanding the Hebrew law concerning divorce. It says:

^NRS Deuteronomy 24:1 Suppose a man enters into marriage with a woman, but she does not please him because he finds something objectionable about her, and so he writes her a certificate of divorce, puts it in her hand, and sends her out of his house; she then leaves his house ² and goes off to become another man's wife.

Now I have to ask the obvious question, for those of you who have been in long term relationships, how many times a month does your partner do something that is objectionable? Clearly we see from the Old Testament, that adultery is grounds for divorce. Sometime after Moses, the Hebrew people removed the death penalty for adultery. There were three accepted reasons for divorce by the time of Jesus. They are adultery, emotional or physical neglect, and abandonment.

Now I want to come back to three scriptures before moving on to what Jesus had to say about this subject. The first is our scripture from Genesis. God decreed in the Genesis account of creation that woman was made for man to be a partner. In other words, God never intended women to be inferior, to be oppressed by men, or to be slave labor to men in the creation story. So in the perfect world of creation, God’s intent was that man and woman would be equal partners in the world and in their relationships. God did not intend women to be slaves, to be oppressed by men, to be there to satisfy their every whim and pleasure. Don’t forget this important point because it is this foundation from which everything else that we will discuss will come. Within the framework of Moses, we need to see how the world had changed. First, by the time of Moses, women had lost ground in relationships and were now considered more property than partner. It is clear from Exodus, Leviticus and Deuteronomy that divorce was a part of the world in which they lived and that divorce and even remarriage were accepted practices. You could divorce your wife and marry another while your wife could also remarry. And it is also clear from Exodus that a man had an obligation to provide food, clothing and marital rights to all of his wives or they could be granted a divorce. This is the only Old Testament scripture which implies that the woman had an opportunity for divorce.

The church has long used the scripture in Malachi to condemn divorce and those who are divorced. But is that what God is talking about here? Remember that I always ask you to read scripture within the context of its passages before and after. In Malachi, the author is a prophet who is responsible for telling the people of Israel that they are being disobedient. Scholars point to the post exile era, when the people had returned from Babylonia and rebuilt the temple in Jerusalem. They again were straying from their obedience to God. So God sends Malachi to warn them of his wrath if they don’t change the way they are. In the midst of this, God uses marriage as a metaphor for the relationship with God. Why? To God, the perfect relationship is a partnership and marriage is supposed to resemble this relationship. So God sees the relationship with humanity as a marriage. Remember I shared with you a moment ago that the Genesis account proclaimed marriage to be a partnership with each side lifting one another. By this time in history, the people of Israel were not holding up their end. So God tells them that I hate that you are sending me away. The word used for divorce actually means sending away. God hates that God is being sent away from the relationship by the people. I once heard of a professor who suggested that the reason God hates divorce is because God has been divorced, many times over. Now some of you may be offended by this but bear with me for a moment. God and humanity from the beginning of time have been in a covenantal relationship. God shared love and expected obedience and love in return. Throughout history beginning in the Garden of Eden, humans have continually turned their backs on God. They have committed adulterous relationships with idols and other Gods. Over and over again they have disobeyed God and turned away. One could easily argue that God and this relationship with humans have entered into separation and divorce many times. God created a marriage relationship between God and house of Israel and Israel repeatedly broke the covenant relationship. God hates the breaking of covenant relationship more than anything else. But understand, throughout the history of the world, God continually shares love with the people of the world. Even when they send God away or divorce God, God still loves them and reaches out to them.

Before leaving this subject, I want to make what I believe to be some important notes. First, divorce was a real, accepted and allowed practice though certainly not the desired outcome of marriage. I am not advocating divorce in any way with this sermon series. God intended marriage to be a partnership. Even though God hates divorce as used in this context, God is referring to the obedience of the Israelite people, post exile; God still forgives us and allows a place for redemption. Tune in next week for Jesus hates divorce and yet I am.    

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[1] Efird, James M., Marriage and Divorce, Wipf and Stock Publishers, Eugene, Ore, 1985, page 11

[2] Efird, page 20

[3] Efird, page 79

[4] Instone-Brewer, David, “What God Has Joined,” “Christianity Today”, October 2007, page 29